Thursday, January 20, 2005

A Confession

Alright. I feel silly admitting this, but: I had registered on eHarmony.com. I use the pluperfect here because tonight I closed my account. It's not that it wasn't finding any matches; I had a three page list going, one of whom wanted to communicate with me (which is part of their trick... registering is free; communicating with others requires paid membership).

I guess the problem was that I just didn't trust the damn thing. My own profile painted me as a little more sensitive and touchy-feely than I really am. And then in the section where you're supposed to share a little about yourself, I just never could quite get the right words to adequately and fairly describe me to an absolute stranger.

The thing is, I'm still interested in finding someone, of course, it's just that eHarmony seemed too damn awkward and they sent way too many emails. And at the core of it all, I don't want to be matched up with someone that similar to me.

Part of me is reacting personally to a few rejections, too. On eHarmony you're given a list of possible matches and you can basically select who you want to keep as an option... and when you look at your matches and you see someone has decided they didn't want to keep you as an option, well, it stings. As dumb as it sounds, it stings.

I dunno. Maybe having a bad week has something to do with it too; maybe I'm taking my frustrations with Linguistics and Foucault and Quantitative Reasoning busywork and an enormous workload in Young Adult Lit and finances and weird vibes at the gym out on eHarmony.

Lord knows I've had better weeks. I guess I just needed to cut some of the static out of my life, and eHarmony seemed as good a place to start as any.

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